Saturday, March 29, 2014

Datanerith Entry 23: A Sense of Humor

I've made Zasit the Beekeper the new Sheriff. Sherlock Holmes was a beekeeper, so maybe Zasit will turn out to be some sort of super sleuth, too? Just don't die on me, buddy. Your job is apparently, like, super dangerous.

More elves have come! I have a lot more to trade this time, like dyed cloth, dresses, and stone scepters encrusted with semiprecious gems. I don't actually have to steal from them now! I mean... I'm still gonna. I just don't have to.


There wasn't much to take, to be honest, aside from a shitload of cloth. There were some animals, I guess. I've got a bunch of caged monkeys, now, which I honestly can't see much non-food use for. I'm sure I'll think of something. I did get a caged crocodile, though, which is fucking awesome. That bad boy is going right in the moat. As soon as I build a moat. I bet ol' Endok is just spinning in his grave.

Speaking of Endok!

In addition to all the new engravings, I've started having a bunch of statues built, to put up in my Hall of the Honored Dead. The statues, like the engravings, are entirely random. Whatever Udib Uzolegul, my sculptor, feels like making. On of my more detailed statues, for example, is of an elf killing a necromancer. Another statue depicts two cockroaches because my weird fucking dwarves just love them some cockroaches for some perverted reason. Also in the Hall of the Honored Dead, I have a statue of Endok. What luck! Remember: the subject of the statues are totally random.


Let me explain what we're looking at here, for those who might not get it: this is a statue of Endok, the very first soldier in Datanerith (and by default, the very first militia commander), who died defending the fort. The statue is making fun of how he lost his position of militia commander. A position which he lost by dying. This statue is ten feet away from Endok's grave. Udib, you are one coldhearted dwarf. Funny, but cold.

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